Things I learned from bad sex
Everyone has had their fair share of bad sexual experiences. Some unfortunately more than others, but we've all been there and sadly have done that.
I personally thought I was over the whole trial and error bad sex thing as I got older and a little more experienced, but tuh' was I wrong.
Turns out bad sex isn't something that just happens in your teenage years. It isn't specifically made out for inexperienced horny teens. There are GROWN ass men out here supplying weak dick.
And yes, I'm putting the blame solely on men today.
Now you're probably wondering why I pointed the finger at just men when it comes down to bad sex, as if it doesn't take two to tango. Don't get me wrong, women can be bad in bed too, leaving men unsatisfied. Bad and childish, actually. Take Blac Chyna for example. So please don't think I'm being biased, but to say women have trash box is pushing it.
You ever ask a man what makes good pussy good? Like what really defines 'good pussy.' He'll tell you the following: wetness and grip. Of course nigga's want to fuck someone who can ride dick and do all types of tricks, but if she can't, it's not the end of the world and he'll still get his nut.
Now ask a nigga what makes pussy bad. Watch him say 'dry, boring and lazy.'
"pUsSy dRy aS ShIt, tHaT tRAsH aSS bOx."
Niggas love saying bitches have trash pussy because its dry-- forgetting that a woman's coocah is naturally wet. If you can't get a woman to stay wet... hate to break it to you fellas, but its you. Sorry pooh.
She's probably boring because she's uninterested in your weak dick. Now lazy? Some bitches are just plain lazy, I'll give y'all that. Getting tired after .5 seconds of riding. But dry and boring? You gotta take this one, beloved. The problem is you.
Niggas on the other hand?
Men have this ego like they're 'that nigga' when it comes to sex. Like they can't do no wrong, like every bad sex experience is at the hands of their partner for not being able to fuck. They seem to think because they started fucking at age 12 they're professionals or some shit. Some of y'all really be out here fucking like a jack rabbit, just pounding away with no care in the world for who you're fucking.
Sex is not a fucking sprint.
Slow the FUCK down.
It's easier to work with a girl who is bad in bed than it is a guy. This isn't up for debate.
Bad sex comes in all forms, it's levels to it. I can definitely say I've had bad sex, one too many times more than I'd like. I mean really, really bad sex. And there are a whole lot of different ways sex can be terrible.
Imagine fucking someone so boring that you hear every squeak of the bed spring. Or being put in an uncomfortable position that your leg catches a charlie horse. And I've straight up busted out in laughter because the sex was so bad. I've also got up mid stroke and put my clothes on.
Bad sex sucks, but you can definitely learn from it. Here are seven things I took from bad sex.
SPEAK UP AND BE VOCAL
You don't have to sit or lie through bad sex. Speak up and tell them it's not working. Tell them what you like, what you don't like. Pretending that sex is good creates a cycle of perpetual shitty sex.
2. CHEMISTRY OUTSIDE THE BED DOESN'T ALWAYS MEAN CHEMISTRY INSIDE THE BED.
For some people this one's hard to swallow. You could flirt up a storm with someone and have great chemistry, but it doesn't guarantee the sparks will continue once your clothes come off.
3. DIFFERENT STROKES FOR DIFFERENT FOLK - STYLE STYLE STYLE
I know I said men are usually to blame for bad sex, but in some cases no one is at fault. Your styles may be completely different from each other and that's okay. It's not necessarily that the sex is bad, but more so you're bad for each other.
4. WE ALL HAVE OFF NIGHTS
You ever have bad sex with someone you usually have great sex with? Happens to the best of us. You can't be a star player all the time. Sometimes you have to accept the fact that you didn't bring your A game. But no worries, you can always redeem yourself champ.
5. SOME THINGS ARE NOT MEANT TO BE DONE MORE THAN ONCE
I like to keep an open mind, but some things are not meant to be repeated. Being open minded spices things up, but that same breath used to spice it up may have ruined the moment, ultimately making it bad. You gotta be careful when trying new things in the bedroom, especially when its not someone you can laugh it off with in case shit goes left.
6. TAKE CRITICISM AND LISTEN.
Sex should satisfy two people. If one person had a shitty experience, 9/10 the other person did as well. It's easy to shut down during or even after bad sex especially if someone comments on it. Get over it. Grow up. Take the advice.
No matter what the reasoning behind your bad sex story is, it happened and as much as you tried to make turn it around and make it better, you couldn't.
Bad sex makes things weird all around. You feel bad and start avoiding the person like the plague. You want to avoid confrontation and potentially hurting someone's feelings. I get it. Often times it leads to denying it ever even happened-- please don't do this. Especially ladies. I'm actually begging you.
Blatantly denying a body looks bad. You can't lie like it never happened, but you can vow to never speak on it again. Erase it from your memory. Remember, erasing it from your memory doesn't mean erasing the body. It doesn't work like that.
Bouncing back from bad sex can be tough, you have two options. either you tell them and allow them to redeem themselves or chalk it up as a loss and charge it to the game.
Whatever you do, don't dwell on it too long. Life is too short for bad sex.